potty traning nightmare

Potty training Adrian has been quite a challenge.  Talk about patience, endurance and perseverance!  We started about 4 months ago, but not really, because he was on pull-ups.  Pull-ups are nothing else than an upgraded diaper - the only difference is that you can pull it up and down.  I told Adrian that he was going to be wearing "big kid underwear" but he still called them diapers.  No difference.  He would get wet, and I would give him the "you need to tell me when you need to go" speech, but it had little to no impact on him.    That went on for about 4 months.  I kept cleaning after him and all - just like a diaper.  
Then, on February 9th, I run out of pull ups and I decided to "upgrade" the potty training to regular underwear that I had purchased for him weeks before.  I told him no more diapers - he begged for "diapers" but I said he was a big boy and he could wear underwear as his daddy and big brother.  Then, the real adventure began.

He will not say when he has to go, I have to keep asking him - and although the answer is ALWAYS no, I would take him anyways and he will go.  Sometimes, he is saying no while he's walking towards the bathroom!  Here is something I do not get: When he is thirsty, he asks for water or juice.  When he's hungry, he asks for "fishies" (fish crackers) or "dinosaurs" (chicken nuggets in dinosaurs shape). When he wants to watch a certain show, he will ask for it: "mommy, I want Diego" or "mommy, I want George" (as in "Go Diego Go" or "Curious George") Or when he's done with dinner and he wants "pote" (postre, Spanish for dessert).  He obviously knows how to ask for things, why can he tell me when he has to go. 

Let me share a little episode from last week. 
Victoria (my one-year old) woke up from her nap, As I was getting Vicky out of her crib, I heard Adrian in his room - he had woken up as well.  I had Victoria on my arms when I walked into his bedroom.  I asked him if he had a good nap, he said yes.  Then I asked him if he had to go to the bathroom, that's when he lost it!.  He started to cry and to say, he didn't have to, but he then started to walk to the bathroom while he was whining.  I had him standing on the toilet.  He still refused to go.  So, I got him down the little stool and asked him to get his pants up.  I turned around for one second and he went - all over the floor, his pants, socks, everywhere! He is crying hysterically by now!   I had to go get Victoria to her chair - much to her dislike - come back to the bathroom - yelled at him for peeing all over himself (then feeling terrible for having done so) I stripped him naked and put him on the tub to wash him - he is crying and sobbing.  I run to get the mop to clean the mess and he yells: "mommy poop!" so I run back to the bathroom, I get him out of the tub, sit him down on his toilet - and he goes.  He is still crying and sobbing and I can hear Victoria crying because I left her in the living room strapped on her little chair. I bathe him after and he eventually stopped crying as he sat down on the couch to watch "George" per his request.

That's only one episode - there are quite a few just like that...

I am not giving up on Adrian.  He is a smart boy - a bit stubborn  - but very smart.  I know he will get it.  I am confident in that.  Meanwhile, I have to keep my cool and be more patient. 

is this payback?

According to my mother, my aunts and even some of my cousins, I was a very calm and quiet child.  My mother says that she would sit me down to play with my toys and I will just sit there - out of her way - playing by myself.  I was content with my dolls and knowing my mother was close by. 

This is me at the age of 2, playing with my doll.

Rafael - age 6

 

 

 

 

 

My mother in law says Rafael, my husband, was a very active boy.  She tells the tales of how she would tie him up to a chair - to, some how, keep him in control and how a few minutes later, he would free himself to go back to his naughtiness.  There are also those stories of how he would go make friends (specially those who had food) and play outside his mother's store all the time. 

Our kids have a lot of us.  Not only physical, but on how they behave.  Nathaniel is a lot like me: calm and quiet, although he can get rambunctious from time to time, generally speaking, he is more mellow than Adrian and Victoria.  Nathaniel can sit down and watch a movie for example, while Adrian has a hard time staying still.  Adrian is more like Ralph.  My mother in law used to say that whenever Ralph would finish his bottle, he would just threw it up in the air - and back then it was glass bottles, so many were lost if she wouldn't catch them.  Adrian did the same thing as a baby!  Ralph is very determined and border-line stubborn - and so is Adrian.  All those stories that I've heard of Ralph being active and mischievous, are becoming a reality in our house with Adrian.   While Nathaniel is analytical and a thinker, Adrian is more impulsive and a go-getter.  He is not shy at all! He makes friends anywhere! He just smiles and off he goes!

So, I often tell Ralph: "this is payback for all the headaches you gave your mom!" but, wait! why am I paying for it? beats me! I was the calm and quiet one... had I known back then that I was going to marry such a rascal, I would have let loose and done a naughty thing or two!

Rafael holding Adrian, Nathaniel and Victoria and I

My biggest adventure

I had always been a very shy, very clam and a play-it-safe kind of person.  Adventure for me was going to the mall by myself.  That was it.  I had a very normal and boring life - going to work, coming home, eating, doing my own manicure and/or pedicure, watching TV and relax.  That was before I decided to embark into the most wild adventure of them all: Motherhood!

It all started 7 years ago with I had my first son: Nathaniel. He was such a good baby; good eater, good sleeper, very mellow and happy baby.  His so called "terrible-two's" were not terrible at all! Potty training him was a breeze - we started on a Saturday, he had a couple of accidents and by the following Wednesday he was ready! He learned to chew with his mouth closed quickly and never talked back! He would wake up early, but stayed in his bed playing for us to get up.  Ah... that was easy...
Four and 1/2 years later came our second son: Adrian.   Adrian was also a good baby, but he is a bit more feisty than Nathaniel is. Don't get me wrong, Adrian is such a wonderful boy. He loves to hug and kiss.  I love that kid! However, I must say that the real adventure started with him.  Adrian is very active, he can't stay still, not even if his life depended on it.  My couches are so worn out, because he jumps on them - even though we tell him not to and he gets "time-out" when he does.  But he gets out of time-out and goes right back to jump on the couches!  Adrian gets so excited to see his brother in the morning that he can't wait for him to get off bed so they can play!  Adrian is almost three years old - in April - and potty training is been a nightmare! It's been about 5 months now and he still does not say when he has to go - so accidents are frequent. 
A year ago, we were blessed with a little girl: Victoria.   She is a wonderful baby.  Sleeps and eats well.  She is crawling every where and, believe it or not, she is a lot more active than Adrian was at that age - GOD HELP ME! 
Motherhood, my biggest adventure? HECK YEAH!  if someone would have told me when I was single, or even when I was a newly wed, that I would be a stay-at-home mom of three, I would have said: "you're crazy! me? mother? I can't even change a diaper - let alone care for three children!" But here I am, doing it and even though I make lots of mistakes, and I yell at my children from time to time, or I snap at my husband for something Adrian did, and every day I finish the day so tired to even watch my favorite shows, I am the happiest woman alive.  Nathaniel, Adrian and Victoria have made my life so much better... so much ADVENTUROUS!